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by eden

My favorite films about an apocalypse world

February 29, 2012 in Eden's Posts

With the doom and gloom of my 18th birthday looming over me, it’s hard not to think about life in an apocalypse world. So lately, whenever I need a little escape, I’ve been watching movies about life after the so-called end of the world. That way, I can multitask—I’m relaxing, but I’m also coming up with survival tips and learning about life in the aftermath. After watching these new favorites, I’ll be prepared for pretty much anything, from the Uni-Gov knocking on my door to zombies furiously craving my brains. Usually, I’m all about reading science fiction and fantasy books in my spare time, but for now, I’m walking through a dystopian wonderland.

Zombieland. I love this movie, maybe because Emma Stone is just so charismatic and Woody is so hilarious. Or maybe it’s because I’ve always wanted to see what a Twinkie tastes like. Emma Stone and Jesse Eisenberg experience their own brand of romantic apocalypse in this movie, so I totally relate to it. Plus, I think that’s really what an apocalypse world is going to look like.

The Day After. This film offers a graphic, disturbing concept of an apocalypse world—it takes place in a small town in Kansas after a nuclear holocaust devastates the United States. This movie freaked people out hard when it was released in the 80s, and kinda freaked me out too.

Planet of the Apes. This film is an absolute science fiction and fantasy legend! Even though I’m young, I prefer old school stuff, so I actually like the original more than the remake. “Ape City” is a scary prospect—not sure what I’d do if walking, talking gorillas captured me. Maybe a young Charlton Heston type would save me! The ending has an amazing cinematic twist.

On the Beach. This is the ultimate romantic apocalypse movie. Earth’s only survivors of a nuclear holocaust come together in Australia—until radiation gets them. The movie’s cool old school cast includes Ava Gardner, Gregory Peck, Fred Astaire and Anthony Perkins. The ending is super shocking.

Dawn of the Dead. The second in George A Romero’s Living Dead series brings the zombie epidemic in an apocalypse world to a whole new level. As the dead rise and prey on human flesh, we follow a group of survivors who barricade themselves inside a shopping mall, basically waiting for the undead to get in and for it all to just be over with. Ahhh, so uplifting!

Source: Chriscad.com

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by eden

Cleaning the slate for an adventure romance

January 4, 2012 in Eden's Posts

It’s a new year and we’re all still here. Some of us Pearls have found that adventure romance, while others struggle to find a mate—especially the girls who are about to turn 18. Yeah, that’s me. Even though I’m secretly dating a Coal (okay, maybe not so secretly, since all of you know), who made me believe in love again at first. Now it feels like I’m back where I started, worried about meeting my doomed fate: a romantic apocalypse. I’m having issues with trusting him and am wondering about the way he acts.

What my super wise Ethics Officer told me to do is make sure that I’m seeing Jamal for who he is, not what I want him to be. She says I think I’m the heroine in one of my fantasy and adventure books, with some supernatural ability to see the future, and that I’m mistaking who he really is with his potential. So what do I do from here? How do I clean the slate and see him for who he is, since from what I hear, boys just do not change—especially a Coal? If I don’t fix the way I’m feeling, it will surely be the end of our adventure romance.

Maybe I should just sage my room and chant to get rid of my evil thoughts. Or I could do a voodoo spell on him that will make him put our adventure romance on top of his list of priorities. There has to be some way to remove the last few weeks from my mind, all the times I’ve caught him flirting with my skanky coworker Ashina. I wouldn’t care if she wasn’t a Coal too. He says that doesn’t matter to him, but at the same time, he seems really into his image. Can I trust that he’ll really be okay with mating a lowly Pearl when he can live out all the fantasy and adventure he’s ever wanted with someone of his own kind?

If I want to make this work and avoid the romantic apocalypse that’s looming over me, then I’ve got to get rid of this energy. I’ve got to purge it, be open to who he really is and stop trying to put enough Midnight Luster on to coat an entire schoolroom. Any suggestions?

Source: Hackadelic.com

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by eden

Fantasy romance… should this be my solstice goal?

December 24, 2011 in Apocalypse World

I’m blown away by all the responses to my last post about the solstice. I had so many emails asking whether my goal is to find a new fantasy romance or work out the one I have with Jamal. Lol, what about the more important things, like my campaign to save the pearls?

Clearly, this campaign and helping my father succeed with his experiment are my ultimate goals.  Yet I’m also focused on saving myself from a romantic apocalypse. Who wouldn’t be? And it looks like the only way to do so is to keep things going with Jamal and hope that he finally commits or once again get back in the game, trying to find a mate—which sounds so gross!

I’ve been trying to maintain our fantasy romance, but honestly, it’s getting tougher by the day. He’s got the upper hand, since he’s a coal and all. I feel like the whole honeymoon period must be wearing off—before, all I could think about was him and I had no issues with him whatsoever. I was blind to his flaws and just wanted to make him happy. Now I’m starting to feel uncomfortable with some of the things I see him doing and my trust is fading.

At first, every time we saw each other, there was an overwhelming feeling of fantasy romance—it was almost tangible. The spark and chemistry that made me feel so alive—the kind of thing you read about in young adult books. Yet I’m starting to realize that you can’t force those feelings. If they fade, you’ve got to accept it—or maybe they were never really there in the first place. After all, I’m a pearl and he’s a coal. Could we really ever have a future?

So in answer to everyone’s question—my priority is still the save the pearls campaign.  If, at the same time, I can save myself from a romantic apocalypse, then that’s pure awesomeness.

The only other goal I set this solstice is to continue to get my story out there—I’ve got to get the rest out there before it’s too late. Whether it’s disguised as fodder for young adult books or accepted as a memoir doesn’t matter to me. The pearls know the truth, and the more people who get exposed to it, the greater our chance of survival.

 

Source: StJohnweddings.com

 

 

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by eden

Will the Winter Solstice bring me fantasy and adventure?

December 22, 2011 in Eden's Posts

I’m excited about the winter solstice. While to some, it’s just the shortest day and longest night of the year, or the first day of winter, for me it’s a time to reflect on the past year and make my goals for 2012. It’s a time to make wishes and lay out a plan to bring them to reality. While my obvious goal is to save the pearls, I also want the next year to bring me all the fantasy and adventure possible—for as long as I’m still here anyway.

The days getting longer represents a message of hope—before long, the end of the cold, darkest season will be here. Instead of thinking about the impending romantic apocalypse, you can start hoping and planning for dreams to come true. It’s a time to hibernate, but not in a depressive way—instead, it’s a time to go inward and reflect.

The darkness comes and it goes—over the next few days, I’m going to think about everything that I really want and see how I can make it all happen. While my obvious priority is to save the pearls, there are other things I am dreaming of—but it would all be turned upside down if we find ourselves in an apocalypse world. In the next few days, I am going to state my goals, rest and re-energize myself for the coming months and year. I’m going to follow pagan footsteps and meditate on how I will bring fantasy and adventure into my life in a good way. While my overall theme is to avoid a romantic apocalypse, I am going to reach even higher. What will you wish for this solstice?

If you’re wishing for love and are wondering if it really exists, check out this blog post on fantasy romance.

Source: Earthrites.org

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by eden

Girl’s Survival Guide for the Apocalypse World

November 29, 2011 in Eden's Posts

Let’s face it—there are so many solutions we’ve gotta come up with like right away. We’re going to have to adapt to an apocalypse world in many more ways than guys do. And if you’re lucky enough to find a mate, it’s going to be even tougher. Trying to keep the fantasy romance alive in your relationship will be tough, if not impossible. Sounds like we’ve got some serious brainstorming to do at our next Save the Pearls meeting.

Obviously, we’re weaker and smaller than most dudes. On top of that, we’re high maintenance—we’ve got a lot more physical issues to learn to live with. For starters, what about body hair? While guys welcome a vacation from shaving and sometimes even look hot with a beard, girls don’t get too psyched about having hairy legs and armpits—except for the hippie chicks anyway. Thought I’m starting to think “hippies” are just fictional characters from science fiction and fantasy novels.

Source: Cryptomundo.com

There are rumors that laser hair removal can permanently remove hair—that sounds perfect for protecting the shelf life of your fantasy romance. I’ve also heard that intense pulsed light (IPL) is cheap and fast, but not as effective as laser. You could always get one of those old school epilator things now, as they’ll be very hard to find in an apocalypse world. Plus, you won’t really be able to use it much, as there’ll be way more important use for your batteries.

A Save the Pearls member is selling these tiny pairs of scissors that you trim away the heaviest areas of hair. This might do the job to keep the fantasy and adventure alive in your relationship.

Ultimately, it would be rad if guys would just learn to love us for who we are, oblivious to our hairiness. I mean, look how hair they are.

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by eden

Young adult fantasy romance—fact or fiction?

November 15, 2011 in Eden's Posts

I keep wondering if my young adult fantasy romance will really happen. Has the idea of real love gone the way of the fairy tale? I know that lust still exists, but what about true love? Monogamous, loyal, intense… love. I believe more in the idea of romantic apocalypse.

Just when I think it’s going well, we hit a bump. It’s like a rollercoaster—or maybe we’re just extremists. We may have jumped in too fast, and now that the climate and everything around me is so highly charged, our feelings are still electric, but it almost feels like love one moment and hate the next. He has to ignore me in front of his co-workers, because they don’t want to believe it’s true.

When I’m bingeing on young adult fiction, I pretend I’m the protagonist, and that by the end of the story, I’ll be sold on the whole idea. But the truth is, I think this whole young adult fantasy romance thing is a myth. It seems like true love is deadly love.

Source: Psychcentral.com

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by ethics officer

Be present

October 25, 2011 in Apocalypse World

If you’ve been playing the dating and mating game for a while and you finally meet someone you think could be the perfect mate, you may get a little nervous about going on dates and making them fun, bonding experiences. When you’re trying to create a young adult fantasy romance, it’s important to make sure that your dates are memorable… in a good way.

Start by being present—this is one of the best ways for taking the beginnings of a young adult fantasy into the type of adventure romance that’s written about in old school harlequin romance novels. When you’re in the moment, it’s obvious—and not just relevant to trying to find a mate or locking down that young adult fantasy romance. When you stay present, it makes your entire life better and more enjoyable.

Make it a point to truly listen to your date, making eye contact and offering interjections here and there to let them know you’re engaged. If you met through posting online dating profiles on a dating and mating site like Save the Pearls, you didn’t have to worry about this factor at first. In person, it’s an entirely different game. You need to listen and pay attention to the little things when you’re getting to know someone. Even if you’re ultimately not interested in them, they could be the perfect mate for a friend—if you truly listen to what they have to say you may recognize a potential young adult romance they could have with someone else that you’re close to. Guess who’ll get the bouquet thrown their way at the wedding!

Stay connected with the moment—leave your phone in the car so that you’re not texting, checking Facebook, or browsing online dating profiles. Be polite—give the person the same courtesy you expect. When you’re trying to find a mate and a fantasy romance, you just can’t be rude. You never know who your date may know! Plus, it’s practice. Eden Newman shared a video in the “Watch” section of the Save the Pearls site, of her friend who basically experienced her own romantic apocalypse on camera. It was awful—definitely not the basis of a plot for one of her favorite harlequin romance novels. The guy was a jerk, and while he was looking for a fantasy romance, it was not with her, and gave her no attention after he got what he wanted. He actually wanted to pursue an interracial dating situation. Perhaps if they spoke about that and paid attention to each other dying one of their dates, one of them would have recognized this and avoided their whole on-camera romantic apocalypse.

When you want to bring your young adult fantasy to life, being present is an amazing tool. Whether you dream of interracial relationships or an adventure romance, you’ve got to be patient and live in the moment. Sometimes it’s difficult to watch Eden Newman in her quest to find her own fantasy romance—because of her imminent deadline, it’s hard for her to not worry about the future. Yet even if she only has a few weeks left, being present every moment of every day will help her manifest the young adult romance she’s dreaming of.

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by ethics officer

Making it a fantasy romance again

October 21, 2011 in Apocalypse World

After dating and mating for awhile, you find the perfect mate and are suddenly immersed in the perfect young adult fantasy romance. It’s heaven for a bit, but then the honeymoon period ends and that adventure romance hits a little bump in the road. How do you improve the relationship and avoid a romantic apocalypse?

Even the most amazing fantasy romance and love stories from Harlequin romance novels hit rough patches. The good news is, it doesn’t mean you have to start your quest to find a mate again. The relationship just needs a little more fantasy romance in the form of fun and spontaneity. Dating and mating successfully is a work-in-progress. Eden Newman forwarded this awesome question and asked us to share some tips for keeping your adventure romance intact so you don’t have to start browsing online dating profiles again.

Be present
With all that we have going on in our lives, coupled with the population’s addiction to technology that keeps us constantly connected, it can be difficult to be present in the moment. Take time every day, with some extended blocks of time during nights and weekends, to disconnect from everything else and give your young adult romance a little quality time. Block out some time that is just for your relationship and nothing else—turn off all your phones, computers, iPads, etc. and just listen to your partner and really connect. Your perfect mate needs to know you are really there and present for them, and they will be able to tell the difference when you’re multitasking, even if it’s subconsciously.

Laugh
Laughter is key to keeping that young adult fantasy romance alive and healthy. Do something together that makes you laugh, whether it’s going to a funny movie or something silly like playing video games at the arcade—just anything that you both think is hilarious.

Get out of your comfort zone
Another way to boost your fantasy romance is to do things that gets you both out of your comfort zone. When you find a mate, it’s easy to fall into a routine that may lead to a rut. Consciously plan to do things you’ve both never done, whether as daring as skydiving or bungee jumping to simply trying a new type of food. On the Save the Pearls website, your profile asks for the top five things on your bucket list, and those items actually improve the appeal of many online dating profiles.  Tackle items like that if you’re feeling ambitious! Either way, trying something new or daring makes you grow individually and is bonding. Even the characters in harlequin romance novels are usually forced to get out of their comfort zone, and the result is usually an unforgettable young adult romance.

Dedicate time for dates
Make sure you have time that is sacred and uninterruptable for your relationship. Schedule date nights and leave your phone in the car during dinner. Set aside a few time periods per week that you won’t sacrifice for anything else. Even Eden Newman has to put aside her campaign to save the pearls so she can cultivate her young adult fantasy relationship.

Focus on the good
The best way to avoid a romantic apocalypse is to focus on its polar opposite: the good in life. Take time remember and appreciate what you love about your partner—and let them know exactly what you’re thinking. Focus on what is really making you happy in your life and talk about it and try to manifest more of it. For example, if your relationship is troubled by the type of issues that often accompany interracial relationships, instead of dwelling on those aspects, focus on what you both have in common and enjoy. When Eden was navigating her own interracial dating experience, she focused only on what attracted her to her partner, not what the rest of her world was thinking. No matter what, don’t blame your partner for the imperfections in your life and relationship.

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by ethics officer

Going Back for Seconds

October 17, 2011 in Apocalypse World

When the romantic apocalypse is upon you and there are no prospects for a young adult fantasy romance in sight, it can be tempting to get back together with one who you once thought was the perfect mate. If you’ve managed to stay friends and you know they’re a good catch, rekindling an old flame can seem right out of the stories in Harlequin romance novels and YA fiction. Yet there are a few things to consider before re-establishing that fantasy romance.

Keep in mind that it’s easy to idealize a past young adult romance, especially when dating and mating isn’t going so well. That said, with a little bit of honesty and a new perspective, you may be able to find a mate in an ex and have a successful adventure romance. You’ll also have to be careful to not repeat the same mistakes so you don’t find yourself immersed in another romantic apocalypse. Below are some tips for navigating this delicate area of dating and mating.

Look for change
The reasons you broke up the first time around must be eliminated. If your ex was the perfect mate except for their excessive partying and drug use, then that element has to be gone for this to become the young adult fantasy romance you want. Perhaps you had some control issues that took the young adult fantasy right out of the mix last time—if you’ve tamed those issues, then it’s possible to make it work this time. Or maybe you lived too far apart and now one of you has moved closer. If a behavioral issue was at the core of the relationship’s demise last time around, then make sure to watch for an extended period of time to make sure those changes are real before you reconcile. If your ex was one of your interracial relationships and it caused issues for them, this is probably something that didn’t just go away and this issue will rear its ugly heads again, killing this adventure romance even quicker than before. Eden Newman experienced exactly that type of situation in her quest to save the Pearls.

Take it slow
As with any new young adult romance, it’s tempting to jump right back in. However, the key to making this fantasy romance last is actually to take it slow. If both of you have changed, then you need to get to know each other again and adjust to each other’s transformations. It’s also good to slow down the physical intimacy and treat this just like you would any other brand new relationship. This helps you make more rational decisions and be sure that it’s time to cancel all your online dating profiles and stop trying to find a mate in other people.

Discuss what went wrong the first time around
Even though you don’t want to rehash the ugly past from your original fantasy romance, having an honest discussion about what went wrong the first time can help you avoid those same issues. It’s important to discuss why it was necessary to change and think of ways to avoid the situations that evoke bad feelings or conflict. For this to grow into the kind of young adult fantasy written about in Harlequin romance novels, you’ve got to be open and honest.

Don’t do it to avoid loneliness
Obviously, for Pearls like Eden Newman and all the others who’ve created online dating profiles on the Save the Pearls site, finding a mate is more about survival than avoiding loneliness. There are also those who only seek interracial dating opportunities and interracial relationships, and loneliness is not a factor. However, for some, the quest stems from a fear of being alone, which is the worst reason to rekindle an old flame. Make sure that you miss the actual person, not just having their companionship. Good luck on making this work! Our next post will tackle the subject of interracial dating…

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by ethics officer

Improving Your Mate-Rate

September 9, 2011 in Apocalypse World

I love it when people try to tell you that attractiveness doesn’t matter when you’re trying to find a mate. Perhaps that’s true in the world of Harlequin romance novels, but not in a world where you need to save the pearls, lol. When you’re dating and mating, or at least trying to, one of the most essential elements of finding the perfect mate is your level of attractiveness, or mate-rate, as we like to call it.

Unfortunately, looks matter, and with technological advances and the media savvy world we live in, image has become increasingly important. From our wardrobe and looks to our level of fitness, charisma and ability to hold a conversation, we’re always being noticed or judged—especially when others are browsing our online dating profiles. It’s as if a romantic apocalypse is upon us and if we don’t project ourselves in the most positive light possible, we’ll never manifest the young adult fantasy romance we’ve been dreaming of.

While perfection is elusive, the basis of attracting the perfect mate begins with physical attraction. Most of us are not just looking to become friends with someone—we’re looking for the butterflies, the young adult fantasy that takes us by storm and makes us forget anyone else ever existed. Respect and friendship are important components of relationships, but there has to be a strong attraction and some bit of chemistry for a fantasy romance to occur.

One of the best ways to improve your mate-rate and obtain that adventure romance is to improve your looks. This means getting in the best physical shape of your life—working out regularly and always striving to take your fitness to the next level. This isn’t just key to attracting others when you’re dating and mating—it boost your flow of endorphins so that you’re happier and more confident, and therefore, more attractive. As Eden Newman points out, Pearls have it harder than most others, especially if they’re involved in interracial relationships. So it’s time to get that workout regimen going and get yourself in the best possible shape if you want to find a mate.

In addition to getting your workout on, grooming is another key aspect in obtaining the young adult fantasy romance of your dreams. In young adult fiction and Harlequin romance novels, they describe the heroine’s beauty in the first chapter. Follow suit by finding a stylish yet flattering haircut, getting lessons in skincare and makeup application, and follow the basic tenets of good grooming: manicures, pedicures, monthly facials, waxing, etc. This type of pampering makes you look and feel better. Plus, taking care of yourself makes you happier and more confident, and that much closer to finding your fantasy romance.

If you’re creating online dating profiles, make sure your profile pic is taken when you look your very best and that it reflects your personality. This is especially important when you’re seeking interracial dating prospects, as reflecting your personality in a photo will give the viewer more insight into who you are, when cultural differences may detract during the initial attraction phase. What is key, however, is that you don’t underplay the reality of what you look like in your pictures. Keep it real, but your very best real.

Make up for where you’re lacking in the physical department with personality. Many people find comedians very attractive due to their stage presence and personality. I’m not saying to prep your own stand-up routine or repertoire of jokes, but if you want to find that young adult romance, you’ve got to use your personality and highlight your best assets. Most importantly, identify your passions and pursue them—it will show your depth, you’ll be happier because you’re pursuing them, and it will translate into… you guessed it, attractiveness!

If you’re looking for an interracial romance, show your daredevil, thrill-seeking side. If you’re a bookworm who likes to bury your nose in the latest young adult romance books or graphic novels, be honest about that. This will help you attract someone with the same interests, which can lead to a successful, compatible relationship. If you’re interested in pursuing interracial relationships, then be upfront about that and honest about what you bring to the table. If you love to champion causes like homelessness, cancer prevention or the Save the Pearls campaign, share all your passions with your potential partner.

If you want advice or have questions about interracial dating, avoiding the romantic apocalypse or you just want to learn more about Eden Newman, send us an email at info@savethepearls.com! We look forward to hearing from you!

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